


For the Love of Thane Krios

by GarnetSeren



Series: Mass Mayhem [1]
Category: Mass Effect - All Media Types, Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Afterlife, Best Friends, Bonding, Canon-Typical Violence, Crew as Family, Don't copy to another site, Established Relationship, Eventual Happy Ending, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Friendship/Love, Getting Together, Grief/Mourning, Happy Ending, Love, Love Confessions, Male-Female Friendship, Marriage, Mentions of Major Character Death, Mother-Son Relationship, No Shepard without Vakarian, One Shot Collection, Revenge
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-10
Updated: 2019-01-10
Packaged: 2019-10-07 20:19:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,867
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17372630
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GarnetSeren/pseuds/GarnetSeren
Summary: This is a collection of unrelated one-shots that I've edited/updated and decided to corral into one place, therefore not all tags relate to all the 'chapters'. The stories included here are as follows:Across the Sea - Shepard gets revenge for Thane's murder (the first fic I ever wrote!)Okasan - Thane tries to understand Shepard's bond with GruntPoison - The crew are sick of Shepard and Thane dancing around their feelingsQuiet Devotion - A re-imagining of what would have happened if Shepard recruited Thane from the beginning of ME2A Stolen Moment - Thane accidentally reveals his feelings for Shepard in the middle of a covert mission





	1. Across the Sea

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shepard had lost loved ones before, seen friends die in battle, but the pain had never stung so much or hit so deep. But she's not going to give Cerberus the satisfaction of destroying her. She was using the pain, the anger. It made her sharper, deadlier. She would have her revenge.

Dappled morning light filtered through the voile curtains that fluttered in the warm breeze, illuminating the gentle white hues of the bedroom; caressing it's way around the carved furniture and soft cottons of the bedding, before settling it's defused rays onto Shepard's face. A sleepy smile pulled at the corner of her lips as she listened to the ocean waves lapping at the sandy shore, whilst the cat purred contently at the foot of the bed. She could imagine the foamy wash cleansing the beach ready for the new day ahead, and took a moment to simply enjoy the peaceful serenity of the moment; so different from the intensity and passion of the previous night.

Memories of their long awaited encounter... the heat of their entwined bodies, the taste of his lips, the love she felt for him... swirled in her mind. Languidly, Shepard stretched before her eyes gradually blinked open. She let her gaze linger on the defined features of Thane's face as he lay beside her, tracing her fingers over the contours of his toned chest; relishing the marked contrast of her skin against his scales, adoring the evident differences of their races.

“Siha,” he whispered gently, as he stirred from sleep.  
  
Her smile widened at hearing his pet name for her, and nuzzled her cheek against his palm, when he reached out to cradle her face in his hand as he planted a tender kiss on her eager lips.  
  
“I love you, Siha,” he murmured.

* * *

Shepard woke with a start.

The stark lines and glossy black lacquer of her quarters, coupled with the immense view of open space above, brought home that she'd been dreaming of _him_... again. Perhaps home wasn't quite the right word; a stealth freighter hurtling through the 'final frontier' was hardly home, especially now that Thane was gone.

She sobbed out his name as fresh tears rolled down her cheeks. Her beautiful, beloved assassin had been taken from her; memories consumed her every private moment, recurrent dreams filled her sleep. Her life had changed the moment she'd met Thane. The suicide mission had been and gone... they'd miraculously all survived... two years had passed, and Shepard had fruitlessly hoped Mordin would pull through with a cure for Thane's Keprals Syndrome... only for her to witness her lover being cut down whilst he was protecting an innocent.

Shepard didn't bother to wipe the tears from her cheeks as she reached for the datapad, that permanently lay beside her on the bed; where Thane had once slept. It had become a ritual, watching the last video messages he'd recorded for her. Every night and morning she'd replay them; they were a comfort and a torture. Pressing the switch, Thane's face flickered onto the screen and she steeled herself before hitting play.  
  
“Face it bravely,” Thane's soothing voice instructed her. “I know you are good at that. I love you.”  
  
She hugged the datapad close to her chest, she ached for him. She'd lost loved ones before, seen friends die in battle, but the pain had never stung so much or hit so deep. But she refused to cave in to the despair, she wouldn't give their enemies the satisfaction. She was going to use the pain, the anger. It made her sharper, deadlier.  
  
“Commander?” came a voice over the comm. link.  
  
“What is it, Joker?” she asked, surprisingly evenly.  
  
“ETA in one hour, commander,” he replied. “Erm...”  
  
His nervous paused caught her attention, perhaps more than it should have, but the pilot had never been a man to be shy about voicing his opinions.  
  
“Yes Joker?”  
  
“Are you... is um... Shepard I...” he mumbled, before trailing off.  
  
Despite everything, she couldn't help smiling to herself. She knew the crew had been concerned for her since Thane's death; she'd done her best to hold it together in front of them, but she knew she couldn't always hide the anger or pain... especially from the ones who were more family than crew by this point.  
  
“I'll be on the bridge in ten” she told him, trying to sound positive.

* * *

The command centre was a hive of activity as she strode out of the elevator, her fury perfectly coiled behind her stoic mask. This mission was pay back. They were honing in on the Cerberus headquarters at Cronos Station, they were closing in on the bastard that had killed her Thane. This was more than a mere mission against the enemy, and the whole crew knew it. This was personal.

Reaching the cockpit, Shepard was only half surprised to see Garrus, Liara and Tali stood waiting for her; accompanied by the familiar sight of Joker lounging in his pilot chair. A mixture of emotions must have flickered on her face, since Garrus walked towards her, his greater height making him tower above her petite frame as he settled his taloned hand on her armoured shoulder.  
  
“We're right behind you, Shepard.”  
  
She mustered a smile in response and nodded. If Thane had been the calming influence in her life, Garrus had always been the rallying one. He was her best friend after all, and it pained her to see the worry in his eyes. As Garrus stepped back, Liara and Tali embraced her from either side, catching Shepard off guard and threatening to make more tears fall. Taking a deep breath, Shepard regained her composer and gently pulled back from them, catching a glimpse of Joker's anxious expression from the corner of her eye. She loved the motley lot like family, so her small smile was actually genuine as she regarded them all.  
  
“We have the best team and the best damn pilot in the galaxy. Things are going to be fine,” Shepard told them, and even she was surprised at how much like her 'old self' she sounded.

* * *

The next two hours passed in a strange haze; expeditious and gruelling. From being approached in the hanger by EDI's android body who requested to come on the mission, to the almost endless waves of Cerberus forces her small squad had encountered as they stormed the station. Shepard's battle-rage grew with each enemy that crossed their path, her fury growing with each dead body. In her long career as a Marine, she'd never been so savage; always trying to be merciful, killing cleanly and swiftly though only as a last resort. But that had all changed the moment they'd taken Thane from her.  
  
Garrus' voice penetrated her blood-haze: “I'm glad you're on our side.”  
  
Shepard barely managed half a smile for him as they ascended the final ramp. It took EDI mere seconds to hack the lock into the inner sanctum of the base, and with weapons readied, the trio edged themselves into the darkened office. Shepard felt a pang of dissatisfaction upon realising the room was empty, save for the flickering orange monitors that shone out of the gloom. Still, they cautiously approached the screens with trepidation, anticipating a trap to be sprung at any moment.  
  
“Not so fast” came a cold voice from behind them.  
  
“You!” Shepard snarled.  
  
Her eyes narrowed and lips contorting to a joyless half-smile. She would know that voice anywhere... Kai Leng. Thane's murderer.

Clad in black, Kai Leng surged forward with biotic powers charging, aimed directly at Shepard. She managed to side roll out of the way, before unleashing a hail of bullets from her shotgun. Her shots were joined by a torrent from Garrus' Assault Rifle and a burst of EDI's Incinerate tactic, which left their enemy dazed by the flames that threatened to engulf him. Finally, Shepard charged a burst of her own biotic powers, Throwing Kai Leng across the room. He fell hard. Blood pooling around his body and the smell of singed fabric filling the enclosed space. He didn't move...  
  
But it was a mistake, believing they'd finished off such a ruthless bastard.

Once the trio had turned their attention back to the data screens, Kai Leng silently rose to his feet, blood trickling from the corner of his mouth. Without warning, he lunged at Shepard, ninjato blade held ready and aiming to sever her spine. She spun instinctively. Shattering the ninjato blade with the hardened gauntlet of her armour whilst unsheathing her own trusty omi-blade. She trust hard and deep in between Kai Leng's ribs, feeling his weight sag against her.  
  
“That's was for Thane you son of a bitch!

 


	2. Okasan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bewildered by his Siha's undeniable yet unorthodox relationship with the tank bred krogan, Thane desperately wanted to find some answers.

Thane sat in his familiar chair in the Life Support Plant, his gazed focused on the shimmering purple hues of the drive core. It had been months since he'd joined the Normandy, and several weeks since his budding friendship with Shepard had grown into the beginnings of a more romantic relationship. His fiery Siha was utterly intriguing, with layers of quirks and charms. Thane had learnt a great deal about the vivacious woman he was falling in love with, but there was still one aspect of her nature that he could not fully discern. It was an almost maddening conundrum, and he slipped easily into solipsism to think.  
  
 _I hear the snarling grumble of hostility from a krogan. I recognise that he'd been with the commander at Dantius Towers, along with the turian who stands beside him. The turian smiles mirthlessly, and motions towards the krogan.  
  
“Grunt’s a little protective of the Commander.”   
  
“Oh? And you’re not Garrus?” A hooded Human female uncloakes and walks passed us, towards the Port Observation Lounge. “Besides, it’s sweet how much he cares about his Okasan…”   
  
It takes mere seconds for my translator to change the strange word into the more familiar one for Mother.  
  
_At the time, Kasumi’s words had puzzled Thane immensely. So putting his training to use, he'd set about gathering intel. that would help enlighten him to the situation. His initial inquiry centred around the commander’s first meeting with the krogan.  
  
 _“No footage from the exchange remain on my system.” The artificial yet pleasant voice intones. “Commander Shepard requested they were removed, shortly after Grunt’s integration with the Normandy crew.”  
  
“I see. Do you have any other memory of what transpired?” I enquire, feeling slightly apprehensive asking such questions to an synthetic being.  
  
“Logs indicate that Commander Shepard entered the Cargo Hold alone, but armed with a standard M-4 Shuriken. Warnings were issued before the commander opened the tank. Upon his release, Grunt attacked the commander and seemed intent of killing her. However after a brief conversation, the commander convinced Grunt to join the crew.”  
  
“Do you know what was said?”  
  
“No records show the conversation. Though data held in my latent memory files indicate that Grunt laughed, after realising that the commander had held her gun to his stomach throughout the exchange.”  
  
_The information had only served to make the picture more convoluted. So after much thought and meditation on the subject, Thane decided a scientific viewpoint may help.  
  
 _“Grunt? Scientific marvel. Was there on Korlus with Shepard and Vakarian. Mission was… problematic. Supposed to recruit Okeer. Instead of krogan Warlord, we acquired tank-bread krogan. Ultimate soldier, but was unknown quantity.”_  
  
“Krogans tend to disregard aliens. Why does Grunt follow the Commander so willingly?” I ask.  
  
The salarian taps his chin. “Interesting case study of krogan, human relations. Have observed many acts of respect and affection from both parties. Stronger in bond than camaraderie or friendship, similar to guardianship.”   
  
“Grunt sees the commander as a Mother figure?” I enquire.  
  
“Understandably. Shepard also displays motherly instinct towards the krogan. May be due to strong friendship with Urdnot Wrex, prior to her death. Have to wonder why you ask? Perhaps infatuated with commander? Drell, human coupling rare but not unheard of. Can give you…”

Thane quickly broke from the memory. He could remember quite clearly how that conversation had ended, without needing to relive it... even if he _had_ read the booklets the professor had sent him, it did nothing to help the current enigma he was trying to solve. Sighing, Thane focused on an event that had happened far more recently... namely, yesterday.  
  
 _An expectant silence hangs in the air of the Crew Deck. The flanging voice of a turian is the only sound. I round the corner to see Garrus surrounded by most of the Normandy's crew._  
  
“We had fought waves of varren and klixen before the ground began to rumble. On our three, a Thresher Maw burst from it’s tunnel and we scrambled for cover. I went high, trying to draw the beast’s attention by peppering it with bullets. Shepard decides to power up that blasted Arc Projector she loves, whilst somehow restraining Grunt. We whittled down the Maw’s health, before she orders me to cease fire and allow the kid to make the kill shot. It took him a couple of blasts from his shotgun, but it wasn’t long before the three of us were running. Because it wouldn't be a day out with Shepard without trying to avoid certain death... first time it's been from a falling corpse though.  
  
Laughter filled the room, and I can barely make out Joker’s voice over the din: “Where’s Shepard now?”  
  
“Still planet side with Grunt. Wrex insisted his 'sister’ stayed for the full celebration.” Garrus replied.  
  
“So she’s either dowing ryncol with Wrex... again. Or running around trying to make sure Grunt behaves himself for once,” the pilot grins.  
  
“Perhaps. But she threw her arms around Grunt like the proudest parent in the galaxy when he finished off the Maw. I wouldn’t be surprised if she’s just sat next to the bonfire beaming with pride.”  
  
“Whilst engaging in a drinking contest with Wrex. You know he was pretty sore he lost their last one…” Joker laughs.  
  
Blinking rapidly, the haze of the drive core came back into view. Everything Thane had discovered had seemed to support Kasumi’s original claim, but nothing had been definite. So he decided it was high time he approached the commander and simply ask her... she knew of Kolyat after all, so he was certain his question would not be offending. So after finding out Shepard's current location from EDI, Thane quickly headed to the armoury. Though upon entering, his steps halted in surprise; the scene he was witnessing was so unexpected that he quickly faded into the shadows. Honestly, Than had never intended to spy on his wonderful Siha, but the situation in front of him certainly required more observation.

Illuminated by the stark light from above the weapons bench, was the undeniable yet bewildering picture of mother and child. The scene faintly reminded Thane of his beloved Irikah, when she would read stories to Kolyat. And however improbably it may have been, the sight his tenacious Siha sat cross-legged on the metal floor accompanied by the imposing krogan who lay prone, made Thane smile. Grunt was gazing in awe at the red head, as she explained the intricate details of a new Shotgun.

Several minutes of demonstration passed before Shepard handed the M-300 Claymore to Grunt, and the young krogan’s face lit up in a way that Thane had witnessed Kolyat’s do, whenever he'd received a new toy as a child. Then within seconds, Thane’s questions were completely and forever laid to rest, as Grunt gave the commander the most astonishingly gentle kiss on the cheek... Thane hadn’t thought krogan’s capable of such delicateness.   
  
“Thank you, Mother,” Grunt rumbled.  
  
“Any excuse to spoil my boy,” Shepard replied, warmly.  
  
She patted the youth’s arm affectionately, before standing up and turning towards the weapons bench that occupied half the room. As a grinning Grunt left the armoury, Thane melted out of the shadows and wrapped his arms around the commander’s waist. He'd already begun to realise the strength of his feelings for the vibrant human, and what he had just witnessed had only increased his regard for her. Shepard twisted in his arms, turning to face him, and wrapped her arms around his neck.

She raised an eyebrow in the way Thane found utterly irresistible. “How long were you watching?”  
  
“Long enough.” Thane told her, cryptically.  
  
“Long enough for what?” Shepard asked, smiling.  
  
“Long enough for my thoughts to be confirmed,” he replied.  
  
“Oh? And what might those be?”   
  
Thane smiled at her warmly. “That you are a gift from Arashu herself, Siha.”

 


	3. Poison

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They've been dancing around each other for long enough, so long that the crew decide to stage an intervention... of sorts. But do Thane and Shepard really need the help that everyone thinks they do?

A gravelly male voice snarled over the lingering power chord of a guitar, as Shepard stepped into the Port Observation Lounge and the doors shut with a quiet whoosh behind her. She was greeted by the sight of Jack and Kasumi, lounging on the couches that looked out of the large viewing window. Jack’s eyes were closed, her head tilted back and an outstretched foot tapping to the rhythm the lead guitar was playing. Kasumi was the first to notice her, and the thief’s eyes sparkled with mischief beneath the dark recesses of her hood.

In swift, graceful movements, the lithe Japanese woman had crossed the short distance between the couch and the bar, and Shepard barely had time to blink, before the thief was by her side; pressing a suspicious looking Martini glass into her hand. An impish grin settled on Kasumi’s face as she stated:

“I’ve told you before Shep, you need to acclimatise yourself.”

With a theatrical sigh, Shepard sipped the drell venom infused drink... Kasumi had been plying her with Weeping Heart cocktails at every conceivable occasion for the past month.Jack gave an amused snort over the tempo of the drum, and lyrics that mentioned poison.

“Dug this song out just for you, Boss-Lady,” she grinned. “Thought you’d appreciate it.”

Shepard couldn’t help smiling, immediately thinking about a certain drell assassin... one she'd spent a fair few sleepless nights fantasising about. Suddenly, a pillow glanced her left hip.

“Normandy to Shepard!” Jack laughed. “Get your head out of your knickers, and hurry up and get changed.”

The commander raised an eyebrow. “And what is wrong with this? We’re only going to Afterlife, after all.”

She gestured to her body, clad in the faux leather dress that she'd worn for the mission on Bekenstein. However, Kasumi chose that moment to hold up an extremely figure hugging dress; one that made mostly of black lace... which suspiciously sounded like the dress mentioned in the still playing song.

“This is better. He’ll love it,” the thief said, giving an exaggerated wink.

* * *

Despite the normal, excessively loud techno beat blaring from the speakers, something seemed _off_ with the song pouring out of Afterlife. Though it took Shepard a moment to figure out what was bothering her about it... the lyrics seemed suspiciously familiar. But before she could think on it further, a clipped voice shouted her name over the music.

"Aria wants to see you. Now," Anto called, beckoning her to follow.

Unsurprisingly, the unexpected meeting with the self-proclaimed Queen of Omega was little more than an informal 'chat'... one that had a suspiciously _friendly_ edge to it. They shared a drink, traded a little information and as Shepard turned to leave, Aria called out to her:

"You should find a nice young man to keep you warm at night... I hear drell are particularly gifted."

Not rising to the bate, Shepard smirked at the asari before returning down the stairs to the ground floor bar; only to be greeted by Joker offering her a very familiar looking drink. The pilot looked like he was up to something, especially with the cheeky smile he was giving her.

"Kasumi said it's your favourite," he grinned, knowingly. "That you couldn't get enough of the taste.”

"You could say that," Shepard laughed, unabashed.

A flash of familiar green scales entered her peripheral. Turning, Shepard saw Thane's onyx eyes appraising her figure. Her heart skipped a beat; the assassin looked every bit the predator in that moment. But instead of feeling intimidated, an excited shiver rippled down he spine. She raised her distinctively coloured drink in a toast to him; letting her lips ease into a devilish smile when his gaze met hers.

Turning away, Shepard placed her now empty glass on the bar and against her better judgement, she signalled the turian bartender to mix her another. Then fresh drink in hand, she made a conscious effort to walk away from the tempting drell; who stood mere feet away from her. Hips moving with an exaggerated sway as she pushed her way through the crowd, to a table that had already been appropriated by the ladies of the Normandy. Tali eyed Shepard's cocktail in an all-too-knowing way.

"I believe it's an acquired taste," the young quarian slurred.

Grinning, Shepard merely drained her own drink in reply; she wasn't going to confirm or deny anything. She closed her eyes momentarily, enjoying the sweet buzz as the alcohol and mild venom coursed through her body. Only for them to snap open in surprise at the sound of a glass being deposited in front of her; an almost familiar turian face entered her vision.

"Compliments of her _lady_ ship," Grizz chuckled.

His mandibles flared in a close approximation to a grin, as Shepard eyed the glass dubiously for a moment. But unable to help herself, Shepard laughed. She had no real clue what and why _everyone_ seemed to be plotting... but she was oddly okay with that. It certainly made a change from tracking down homicidal maniacs, and there could be worse things for them to be up to, instead of trying to get her hooked on drell venom, in the very least.

When and how the group of women decided it was a good idea to invade the dance floor, Shepard couldn't say. Though to her great satisfaction, they'd managed to coerce the majority of the male crew to join them in the debacle. Though the three stooges of Garrus, Grunt and Zaeed had seemingly hung on to the bar for dear life. However, glancing around the press of bodies, Shepard noticed there was also a drell distinctly missing from the round up.

Without warning, strong hands pulled her flush against a toned, leather clad body. Desire flushed Shepard's body as she turn her head and her lips found his; she found him intoxicating... and Thane was an addiction she _fully_ intended to keep.

 


	4. Quiet Devotion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thane knew he was blessed to meet two Sihas in his lifetime, one who woke his soul and the other who set it free. He loved them both, and was lucky enough for them both to love him in return. But when the time came to journey across the sea, he could only reunite with one.

Thane had been surprised when he'd first caught wind that Cerberus, of all factions, were looking to hire his services... apologies, recruit him. Given the syndicate's history, he thought the news was questionable at best; and considering the same source had told him the rumours about _the_ Commander Shepard still being alive were actually true, Thane couldn't help doubt the integrity of the original information. But then a woman resembling the dead Saviour of the Citadel blazed through Dantius Towers, apparently looking for someone... someone who wasn't Thane's target. She was dressed in black armour with a N7 logo; impressive, if it wasn't a replica. Accompanying her were two more humans, very clearly wearing Cerberus uniforms. So perhaps his contact _had_ been correct all along.

He was surprised that the commander sought him out before anyone else, and honestly, Thane was unsure what to make of the woman; a woman who'd sacrificed human lives to save a multi-species council, but was now a member of Cerberus. But Shepard explained her mission before he agreed to join her, and once he was settled onboard her ship, she came to him in private to answer any questions he had... and to promise that if any of the Cerberus crew gave him grief, she wouldn't hesitate to throw them out the airlock. From the way she spat the faction's name, Thane didn't think she was joking. So taking a risk, he questioned her. He asked her why she was really with them, and where she had been since her supposed death. Thane hadn't expected the answers he got, but he believed her.

Shepard had touched Kalahira's shore and returned; that alone made her remarkable. She was working with an enemy syndicate to help innocents, no matter how badly it affected her personally to do so, which earned her his admiration. She readily admitted she'd trust an assassin at her back far more than the Cerberus personnel he'd previously seen her with, so Thane silently vowed to protect her.

With that in mind, he geared up every time the ship's AI advised of an ETA. Whether it was a potential mission or simply a supply run, he'd wait in the CIC near the galaxy map 'meditating', to dissuade the yeoman's interactions with him; ready in the event Shepard needed him. At first she seemed surprised... whether because of his initiative, or the fact he'd already learnt her habit of checking the galaxy map before heading out, he wasn't sure. That surprise turned into a smile before asking if he was up for accompanying her, though eventually, Shepard would just lay a hand on his shoulder or bicep or forearm in silent thanks, before simply explaining whatever needed achieving.

So Thane accompanied her when she returned to the Citadel for the first time since her resurrection, and watched how she faked a smile for the C-Sec officer when he announced the system listed her as dead. He saw how she shook her head as the the C-Sec captain overrode the issue, before telling the man to contact her if he ever needed help... undoubtedly as a way to repay the unexpected favour.

Thane provided silent support when she met with the human councillor; he expected some sort of backlash from the man, but he literally greeted the commander with open arms. It was obvious the two were old friends, and Thane later discovered that Anderson had once been Shepard's captain... though he pointedly ignored how cold she became when the councillor's aid entered the room, because evidently there was history there as well, and he was certain she'd tell him if need be. However, Thane did congratulate her when the other councillor's unanimous agreed with Anderson to reinstate her Spectre status. He even agreed to her suggestion of a drink to 'celebrate', though spent most of the night wondering why the liquid in her glass was a startling shade of green... it didn't look fit for human consumption.

Thane was with Shepard when she set foot on Omega for the first time; when she recruited Zaeed and Mordin. He was there when she infiltrated the station's gangs to reach Archangel. He was there when she ran to the turian who turned out to be an old crew mate and friend, and watched as the pair pressed their foreheads together... pushing aside the unexpected pang of envy at their closeness.

He was there when the turian took a rocket to his face, and watched stunned as Shepard _Charged_ a gunship to take it down. He was there as she knelt in her friend's blood, trying to hold the turian's face together and took it upon himself to radio for evac. Thane had previously learnt she trusted the pilot and the doctor, both old friends from her hunt for Saren, so he was certain Shepard would want their help to save her friend.

But _he_ was the one the AI notified later on, whilst the turian was in surgery and the commander had been sat motionless on her shower floor for thirty standard galactic minutes. Thane had gone to Shepard's cabin for the first time that night. He tried not to sputter when the heat and humidity of her private bathroom hit his stricken lungs, he tried not to wince at the shocking pink hue her usually pale skin had turned because of the scalding water. He'd helped her get dry, helped her dress in an oversize shirt he was sure had once been the pilot's, before he helped her to bed. Thane hadn't slept at all that night; waiting patiently in the Life Support Plant in case Shepard needed him again.

Even once her friend had recovered from his surgery and was fit for missions, Thane remained at Shepard's side... sometimes working alongside Garrus, but never relinquishing his place on her team. Which meant Thane had the honour of escorting Shepard... apologies, Ms Gunn... to the most prestigious ball of the criminal underworld in order to aid Kasumi. He was the envy of most of the men and many of the women as he walked in the commander on his arm. Shepard was a striking woman on an average day, but dressed in a figure hugging leather dress, her auburn hair artfully pinned up and her stunning olive eyes rimmed with khol... she was breath taking.

He was also the one who journeyed through the jungle of Zorya with Shepard; though only after assuring her several times that the humidity would not aggravate his condition. Thane took a double dose of his nebuliser to ensure his words were no more than a white lie, and was rewarded by witnessing Shepard not only rescue the enslaved refinery workers, but also when she managed to shoot down a gunship with an incredibly aimed missile, from the heavy weapon he'd originally questioned her bringing. Though obviously it had been invaluable, since it helped earn her Zaeed's loyalty.

Thane accompanied Shepard to Korlus, expecting to recruit a krogan warlord, only for them to return to the ship with a tank bred warrior. He hadn't been with her when she released the tank bred, but he _had_ been the first one to see the angry bruises already forming on her delicate throat... the krogan who lumbered into the Mess Hall not long after was the obvious culprit, and Thane silently vowed to grant the male a slow painful death the moment the opportunity arose. But then Shepard had laughed as the krogan threw an arm around her shoulders, loudly congratulating her on nearly taking out his kidneys; Thane decided the krogan could live since it seemed the commander was alright, though he thought it might be prudent to keep a closer eye on her if they ever ran into any more krogan.

As usual, Thane was by Shepard's side when she headed to the prison ship: Purgatory, in order to obtain a powerful criminal biotic by the name of Jack. He instantly hadn't like the almost lecherous attention the warden paid to the commander, and was on high alert as they made their way through the ship. He hadn't been at all surprised by the turian's betray and neither was Shepard, however he doubted either of them expect Jack to appear the way she did. Thane almost expected the two women to come to blows when they eventually spoke, but it quickly emerged that Jack hated Cerberus perhaps even more than Shepard did... so Thane knew immediately the pair would become friends, he just wasn't sure how much that should concern him.

He was with her on Horizon; where for the first time, he lost his composure. When the man who'd originally hugged Shepard after the fight against the collectors, began to throw around accusations, Thane had a hard time remembering his breathing exercises to remain calm. But when he'd accused her of being a traitor even after Garrus had vouched for Shepard, then threatened to 'expose' her to the council... granted, it was more fool him since the council already knew of the commander's activities and Anderson was sent regular reports... Thane couldn't stand by and listen the man disparage the commander any further.

So he stepped forward, passed Shepard to almost shield her, before grabbing the man by the throat. If she hadn't moved between them, physically turning her back on her old crew mate... one of her hands closing around his wrist whilst the other gently rested on his chest... Thane would have crushed the man's windpipe without remorse. As it was, his expressionless gaze softened as it met her vivid green eyes, and after giving a warning squeeze, Thane let the man drop to the ground. Without any real thought, Thane's offending hand found Shepard's hip as she called Joker for evac, and the male glared at him furiously from where he lay in the dust. However, Shepard didn't seem to mind his familiarity, and Garrus actually smiled at him.... the first time since Thane had made the turian's acquaintance.

Thane went with Shepard to Haestrom to help her recruit her old friend Tali; barely containing his smile as he watched their enthusiastic hug once the quarian agreed to join. He accompanied Shepard back to Illium to recruit Samara, and was by her side when she thought her old friend Liara had been caught by the bomb at the Dracon Trade Centre. He hadn't minded when Shepard seemed to instinctively reach for his hand as she stared at the billowing flames, and Thane did his best not to show how the acrid smoke affected him when they raced into the building. He'd held on for dear life as she weaved them in and out of traffic chasing a disgraced Spectre, and stormed the ship orbiting Hagalaz; though was ashamed that he'd been knocked unconscious by debris hurled by the Broker. However, Thane was with Shepard when she properly met Feron... the drell who'd helped recover her body. Though he pointedly didn't notice the tears in both their eyes when she pulled the male into a careful hug.

He was with her when they went to Tuchunka for Grunt as well as Mordin, and chuckled when he'd witnessed her reunion with the krogan leader, though winced when she'd headbutted one of her friend's rivals... not that it came as a surprise. Thane was also with Shepard when she headed once again to Illium for Operative Lawson, and returned to Omega for Samara. He travelled with her to Aeia for Jacob, Pragia for Jack, and the Migrant Fleet for Tali. He'd accompanied her to the Citadel to help Garrus, and watched as she not only stopped him committing murder, but woke the turian from his battle sleep.

It gave Thane pause. The scene both reminded him of his beloved Irikah, and made him confront the feelings he'd developed for Shepard over the months they'd worked together. Because throughout it all, during the quiet times in between missions, they talked. She was open and honest, kind and compassionate, as well as determined and uncompromising in her principles. She was curious and asked questions, listened to the answers. She was considerate of his views even when they differed from hers.

Shepard intrigued him, he was drawn to her. At first Thane presumed it was mutual respect then friendship, a novelty in his line of work. But it had grown far beyond that. During the times he spent with her, Thane grew to realise what Shepard really was... a Siha. A warrior angel of the goddess Arashu. His respect had become a certain reverence, but the way his heart had pounded when she wilfully stepped in front of Garrus' scope, made Thane realise what he felt for Shepard was no longer platonic. And then she'd lingered, her gaze soft and words comforting, when he finally revealed the truth about his family. She'd offered help before he'd even finished explaining about his son... the mere fact she reunited him with Kolyat after so long, and prevented his son from making a grave mistake without thinking twice about it. It all made Thane wonder. It made him hope.

After being with Shepard through Horizon and the Illusive Man's ploy on the collector's ship, when Thane had heard about the dead reaper, he couldn't help the sense of dread that washed over him. So he finally told her how he felt the night before that mission; the first night they kissed. Her lips were the sweetest thing he had ever tasted... until he'd tasted her lips _after_ the mission, where he had thought he'd lose her a dozen times. Then the mission to help Legion... the geth Shepard had someone befriended... was almost a vacation compared to what they'd been through. Until they discovered the Normandy had been attack, with Jeff the only survivor.

Thane had gone to her cabin whilst they were on route to the Omega Four relay, he confessed his fears and admitted his feelings for her far surpassed merely caring for her. He loved Shepard... his Siha. Thane hadn't expected her to share the same depths of feelings, but had almost fallen to his knees in front of her when Shepard said she loved him too. Perhaps it was selfish, he was a dying man long before he met her, but he dedicated the last hours before the mission to worshipping Shepard like the goddess she was... and if by some miracle they both survived not only the relay but the mission as a whole, Thane silently vowed to ask his Siha to be his wife.

So when they'd all survived, the crew had been rescued and Jeff piloted them back safely through the Omega Four relay, Thane dropped to his knee in front of Shepard... as per the most popular human tradition... and asked her to marry him in the middle of the CIC in front of their friends. He hadn't expected Shepard to vid-call her old captain, the moment she'd changed from her blood stained armour, and asked him to marry them immediately. Though when Thane considered the lives they led and his own prognosis, he understood. He had fully embraced his Siha's enthusiasm.

That night he'd made love to his wife... a week later they were torn apart.

During her incarceration... apologies, her 'voluntary' stay on earth after the Alliance's 'request', so she could 'discuss' her death, resurrection and subsequent involvement with Cerberus... Thane had tried to contact his Siha numerous times. Vid-calls, extranet messages, even archaic pen and paper. Everything bounced back. In the end, he and Kolyat ended up visiting earth just so he could feel somewhat close to her.

Time had always been against them, but with his health steadily deteriorating... resulting in him acquiring a room at the Huerta Memorial Hospital... Thane began to record holo-messages for Shepard. He wanted his Siha to know how much she was loved.

Six months passed, the reapers finally invaded and Earth was hit. Thane was beside himself as he watched every news station, desperately searching for _any_ news about his wife. Then by some miracle, Kolyat's boss: Captain Bailey, had received a message from Shepard; which meant Thane finally had a way of contacting her at last. Though another two days passed before he received a reply. However, since his Siha had chosen to visit in person, Thane hadn't been upset. The feeling of Shepard being in his arms again had settled his soul; he was only complete when she was with him, and it had broken Thane's heart to admit his health had deteriorated too much for him to join her.

He had worried that would be the last conversation he would ever have face to face with his wife, but Shepard made visiting him as much a priority as she could with the weight of the galaxy once again on her shoulders. Thane composed her beautiful love letters daily, hoping to show his Siha the depth of his love before time finally caught up with them. He was gifted with the opportunity to see his wife twice more in relative peace before the inevitable happened... but to fight beside her once more, to aid her once more with her mission, it was more than Thane had thought to wish for. What was more, his Siha was with him at the end. He'd worried he wouldn't see her again before Kalahira claimed him. But Shepard held him tight, silent tears rolling down her porcelain cheeks as she recited the old prays with Kolyat, from the book Thane had secretly translated for her. His last thought before closing his eyes was that his Siha had never looked more beautiful.

* * *

Thane had not expected to see Irikah waiting for him at the shore line. But there she was, his first wife and first love. She was the mother of his son, the Siha who awoke his soul, and she would always remain in his heart. But the love Thane had shared with Irikah paled in comparison to the love he had with Shepard; the Siha who had set his soul free. So with head bowed, he approached his first wife, a thousand apologies on his tongue, though each died the moment his Siha with sunset coloured eyes pulled him into her arms.

“I know,” she said, softly. “I have watched over you, Thane, and I know.”

“Irikah, I...”

“Hush...” she soothed. “I love you, Thane. But I know your heart does not belong to me any more.”

“I have never...”

“Stopped loving me, I know. But what you share with her is stronger,” she said, smiling kindly. “Do not worry, I will wait with you until your Siha with forest coloured eyes crosses the sea.”

And so they waited.

The gentle tide lapped at their bare feet as they looked out at the beautiful, perpetual sunset that caressed the horizon and set the sky alight with a myriad of pinks, oranges, purples and even golds. Irikah's hand entwined with Thane's, a comforting reminder he was not alone in his vigil. And before long, others joined them. Mordin and Legion, who busied themselves collecting colourful shells as they waited. Next came Anderson, and Thane bowed respectfully to the man he knew his Siha held dear. Time had no real meaning on Kalahira's shore, but after that, it didn't feel like he had waited long before Irikah lightly squeezed his hand.

“She is here...”

His gaze followed where she pointed and his breath caught in his throat. Shepard was a vision, haloed by the soft sun, her fiery hair set ablaze in the warm light. Thane paused long enough to raise Irikah's hand to his lips, kissing her knuckles as not only a thank you but a final goodbye to his first wife; he somehow knew he would not see Irikah again.

“Go...” she urged, smiling serenely. “Your Siha is waiting.”

Unable to hold himself back any longer, Thane ran through the surf, scooping Shepard up in his arms the moment she was within reach. Tears rolled silently down his cheeks as he laughed, happy and relieved to hold his wife again. She faired no better, and he could taste the salt of her tears as his Siha pulled him into a lingering kiss.

“I missed you,” she whispered.

“I promised I'd be waiting,” he smiled.

Finally setting Shepard on her feet, Thane wrapped an arm around her shoulders and guided her to the white sand shoreline. He wasn't at all surprised that Mordin, Legion and Anderson were waiting for them. However, Thane had expected his Siha to run and greet them, so was surprised when her arms snaked around his waist instead, squeezing gently.

“Speaking of promises...” she said, quietly. “Do you know if there's a bar around here? I told Garrus we'd wait for him with a drink.”

Thane smiled in understanding, and kissed the top of her head. “I'm sure we can find one, Siha.”


	5. A Stolen Moment

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Throughout the months they'd known each other, Thane had kept a closely guarded secret. Not about his life before, not about his impending death, not even about his beloved son. No. The secret he kept was much more fragile, much more delicate, much more dangerous. However, during a mission to take out a group targeting cross-species couples, Thane finally realised he couldn't keep his secret from Shepard any longer.

With determined control, Thane breathed through the stabbing pain the pulsing lights caused. As a rule, he tried to avoid clubs as much as possible, hating how the strobe lighting played havoc with his enhanced eyesight. He knew without a doubt he'd be nursing what his human crew mates called migraines come the morning. Really, he should have said no... he _could_ have said no... but when Shepard came to ask for his help on a mission, Thane simply couldn't refuse. It wasn't just because she was his commanding officer, it wasn't because he was her weapon; her will was his will. No, he'd agreed to help because Shepard was his friend. A novelty considering his line of work. He valued her, cared for her... perhaps more than he should.

Thane couldn't deny he found the commander attractive, despite or perhaps because of her alien-ness. Her porcelain pale skin that had a smattering of differently coloured flecks across her nose, cheeks and decolletes. Her fiery red hair that looked so soft and fell just shy of her clavicle. Her startling emerald eyes, made more vivid by the kohl she favoured. Her full lips that Thane could never decide whether they were more rose pink or blush. Commander Shepard was a striking woman, she was captivating, and just the sight of her confidently sashaying into the club had Thane's breath catching.

But Shepard was beautiful in every sense of the word; not just her looks, but her soul as well. She was kind and patient, believed in helping those who couldn't protect themselves, threw herself in harms way so others wouldn't have to. Despite her well deserved reputation... her legend as a war hero and Saviour of the Citadel... she was surprisingly sweet and friendly. Shepard genuinely cared for those she worked with, and if you were lucky enough to call her a friend, she was unflinchingly loyal. Thane had witnessed her help every member of her team; she'd even help reunite him with Kolyat, stopped his son from walking a path he'd strived to keep him from. Shepard was a Siha, in every sense of the word, so he couldn't even contemplate refusing when she'd needed help.

Though despite the care and respect he had for her, despite the careful control he kept on his emotions, despite the fact others thought he was cold and aloof, Thane was just male. He had thoughts and feeling, wants and desires, just like the next person. So he could admit, at least to himself, that he cared for Shepard as more than a friend. She was one of the few bright sparks in his dark galaxy, he would gladly worship her body and soul... in his more selfish moments, Thane contemplated telling her, but common sense always won out. His life was full of sin, he was dying, and Shepard deserved so much better than he'd ever be able to give her. But he was also a person, imperfect and fallible, so he couldn't help indulging in the fantasy as Shepard slipped into the booth beside him.

His arm curled loosely around her slender shoulders, his fingertips tracing indistinct patterns on her ridiculously soft skin. He brashly cupped her jaw gently, his thumb sweeping daringly along the line of her lower lip, and Thane drank in the sight of her smiling up at him. His eidetic memory catalogued her in that moment; from her dazzling features, the short silk dress that complimented and contrasted his customary leathers perfectly, the softness of her skin beneath his fingers, the floral scent of her hair, to the way her lithe body shifted to curl into his side.

Shepard whispered his name, her voice barely audible over the thumping club music. Her emerald eyes searched his for a heart beat... looking for answers to questions Thane could only guess... before her gaze fell to his mouth. In a moment of madness he leant forward, gently brushing a kiss to her incredibly soft lips. He knew then, without a doubt, he'd just given himself away. Exposed his true feelings, made himself vulnerable.

Because despite their rouse... their roles as lovers in order to attract the attention of some rogue group that were terrorising cross-species couples, that Aria had tipped Shepard about... Thane knew soft and gentle hadn't been part of the equation. Overt. Blatant. Conspicuous. _That_ had been their game plan. To act as ostentatious with their affections as possible; to be barely the respectable side of lewd in order to attract attention. Warm and affectionate had never been part of the equation.

“I'm sorry,” he murmured, making himself meet her emerald gaze.

“We have a mission,” she whispered, not unkindly.

“I understand.”

Shepard gave a faint shake of her head. “I don't think you do.”

Then to Thane's utter amazement, she was the one who leant in, pressing a tender kiss to his unresisting lips. Unable to help himself, he smoothed a few errant strands of her fiery hair out of her beautiful face, and marvelled that it was softer than he'd imagined. One of Shepard's hands cupped his face as she smiled at him sweetly, the other lightly landing on his thigh, her thumb stroking over the leather. But before anything could be said... before his suddenly racing heart had a chance to calm down, or his racing thoughts had the opportunity to quieten... their omni-tools vibrated; Kasumi alerting them to their targets' arrival.

“We'll talk later?” Shepard asked, quietly.

Thane offered her a small smile. “Of course, Siha.”

Her brow furrowed at the word, one he realised would be so foreign and strange to her, but thankfully Shepard didn't press. Instead, she moved to gracefully straddle his lap. She knelt above him and Thane couldn't help taking a moment to look up at her in awe, before a small groan was pulled out of him as her lips crashed into his. Her tongued swiped the seam of his lips, demanding entrance that he readily gave. His hands wandered down her toned, silk covered spine, before indulgently wrapping around the backs of her strong yet creamy thighs. Shepard hummed her own approval, pressing her powerful yet petite body against him, and Thane knew he was a goner. He'd crawl on his hands and knees, beg at Shepard's feet, just for another taste of her... for the chance to love her. And just as that thought flashed across his mind, their omni-tools vibrated again, letting them know they'd attracted their targets attention.

“Wanna get out of here?” Shepard giggled, loudly.

Feeling a little impish, Thane stole another kiss before smirking up at her. “Thought you'd never ask, babe.”

Shepard's snort of laughter was a little too honest to be considered 'in character', so he filed that reaction away to contemplate later. He'd asked both Jeff and Ken for a suitable human endearment, and though it had sounded odd to him, Thane had decided to trust them. Though if Shepard's continued chuckles were anything to go by, the endearment didn't sit right with her either. However she covered her genuine reaction well, making a point to 'accidentally' stumble into one of the gang members, as she pulled him out of the booth. The man looked disgusted as Thane leant down to kiss the junction where Shepard's neck met her shoulder, and they garnered several more scandalised looks as she led him towards Afterlife's lower exit. Half way down the grimy, dimly lit corridor their omni-tools vibrated again, letting them know Garrus had them in his sight. Another buzz meant the gang wasn't far behind them.

With unspoken agreement, Thane backed Shepard up against the nearest wall, his lips already crashing to hers. He could taste a hint of spearmint as his tongue started a passionate dance with hers, and despite his best effort to remain in control, he knew she could feel his arousal starting to make itself known. But still, Shepard wrapped the leg furthest from the exit around his hip, and he smoothed his hand up her toned thigh; inching up the hem of her dress so he could reach the heavy pistol strapped there... a final buzz from their omni-tools let them know it was really show time.

Thane whirled, shooting the nearest thug point blank between the eyes; just as Shepard flowed around him, her biotic energy tingling enticingly along his spine, before she Threw two more assailants into the opposite wall with bone-crunching impact. Kasumi uncloaked behind another pair and dispatching them easily, before the final one went down thanks to Garrus' well timed sniper bullet. Thane doubted he'd ever forget watching Shepard turn to look at her best friend, at the exact moment he released the shot; unflinching even as the bullet rippled through her hair.Thane hoped one day, Shepard would have as much faith in him as she did the turian.

However, as Shepard finally flipped her comm. link back on to radio Aria for clean up, Thane couldn't find it in himself to be jealous. It was only natural for the commander to trust Garrus unequivocally. There was history there, shared experiences, and they moved in a fight like two parts of a whole. It was obvious they were partners as well as friends, and Thane could never have begrudged her that. Besides, he couldn't help smiling to himself as they made their way back into the club, and his hand gently brushed against Shepard's. She didn't turn to look at him, instead her little finger entwined around his. Thane squeezed her digit back lightly in response, letting Shepard know he understood.

She wasn't ignoring their moment from before. It was on her mind too; a happy memory, if the slight quirk of her distracting lips was any indication. But it was too fragile a memory to air in public. It was something to be revisited in private, just the two of them. And whatever happened, that moment was cherished. It was valued and precious. It was theirs.

 


End file.
